Falling in love is fun, exciting and romantic. It is all the things we dream of and romance novels are made of. And of course then there is falling out of love- it is, as we know, just the opposite. The end of a significant relationship will bring with it fear, grief and sadness and […]
When it comes to divorce it is the emotional roller coaster that is the hardest part to both experience and manage. One moment you will feel ‘I’ve got this’ only to feel like you are upside down and have no idea where to turn a few moments later. Divorce is a process of change. You […]
“My son is almost 14 and daughter almost 12. There is a current order in place dated 2015, however, both of our children are asking to change the arrangements that are set down in the order. At what age do children get to choose their preference for living arrangements? How do we go about changing […]
When we think of the word ‘Divorce’ it rightly conjures up feelings of hurt, pain and all sorts of difficult emotions that most of us would prefer not to ever have to experience. The idea that you could survive your divorce in style probably sounds too good to be true but thanks to my day job as […]
Most people experiencing divorce say they ‘just want it to be over’. What they are really saying is that they want the feelings and emotions to have passed. So if you are thinking of divorce here are 10 things you will need to get you through and out the other side in one piece
This time next week, I’ll be nervously sitting in a Green Room waiting for my turn on stage at the Dancing CEOs gala event. Right now, I am just looking forward to the moment where the event is over (just so I can stop singing the same tune and dancing the same steps in bed […]
I love a guest blogger and this week my fellow Family Lawyer, Fiona Caulley is sharing her learning on Mindfulness and its application to our daily practice of law. I had the pleasure of hearing Fiona present on this topic last weekend at a conference we were both involved in. I loved it! So much […]
My dear friend Liz is back with another instalment in her life (post divorce) and this time she is hitting us with her recent dalliance with ‘online dating’ after divorce! I will be upfront with you- I was dating before the days of the ‘online’ world really taking over and I found it hard enough then! The thought of now having […]
Oh St Valentine! Once a year you appear to remind us of all the beauty that love brings. Which is fine when you are in those early loved up stages of a relationship, when every day feels like Valentine’s Day. But if you are in the thick of managing the great ups and downs of […]
The first time I heard the term ‘divorce coach’ I am pretty sure I may have rolled my eyes! But that was a while ago, before I met one and before I had any understanding of what a Divorce Coach really is. It makes sense if you think about it- someone who understands what it […]
Divorce is one of the most significant grief events many of us will ever suffer. Is it any wonder then, that during divorce, good people suddenly seem to be mad? As a Divorce Lawyer I have seen it all. People who in any other situation are entirely ‘normal’ all of a sudden turn into crazy […]
When I look back on the year that has been 2015 I will remember it for my daily pursuit of ‘happiness’. It’s not that I spent the years prior to 2015 being unhappy- it is just that this year I read, learned, listened and practiced all sorts of things to consciously understand just what being […]
It is almost Christmas! Such a beautiful time of year (well so the songs say!) and I must say I love Christmas- it is a time when I am with my closest family and friends, holidaying, celebrating and just being grateful for all that the year has thrown our way. But I know that for […]
Parenting is one of life’s joys, but at the same time is one of life’s challenges. Parenting during separation and divorce is perhaps more of a ‘challenge’ than a ‘joy’. The breakdown of any significant relationship is one of the most difficult grief events many of us will ever experience. It is therefore no wonder […]
Yes, I am a divorce lawyer and yes, I am encouraging you to be ‘friends’ with your ex! Now before you start with those usual ‘lawyer’ comments I want to just note that in my job I have seen it all. I deal with couples who are falling out of love every day. I have […]
The desire for one parent to move after separation can raise so many questions and sometimes even more hurdles so that it may seem out of reach but remember, there is always more than one way to skin a cat.
Liz is back with the second of her instalments on surviving divorce! She bravely shares with us one of her ‘silver linings’ after she realised she needed to move ‘back home’. Divorce throws so many curve balls but having the safety and security of good friends and family can never be more valuable than when things are tough.
Before you get too excited this week’s post is not about dating! A dear friend who just happens to be a successful writer and business owner has been putting pen to paper (or perhaps more correctly fingers to the keyboard!) and writing a series of articles for my collection. So, let me introduce you to my friend Liz who has made me really proud over the past months as she has been living the rollercoasters of divorce with style and pride (and many a tear along the way!)
Divorce is bad enough without then having to explain to those you love and even those you barely know just what you are going through. Often the most challenging conversation to be had is with your children. So here are 5 things to keep in mind when you are telling your kids, about your separation.
Parenting is full of joys and challenges. Sometimes there is more joy than challenge and then there are those days when there seem to be only challenges to face with little joy. This is the case whether you are parenting together or apart. For parents who find themselves navigating the end of their relationship there can be some […]
Almost this time last year Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin hit the front pages of the news with their wacky idea that they were ‘consciously uncoupling’. They were not ‘getting a divorce’ instead they had made a conscious decision to bring their marriage to an end in a positive way. In fact they had untangled their […]
Last week I read a beautiful article titled ’10 Unexpected silver linings of Divorce’ by Carolyn Martin, a mother who has herself experienced divorce. It is a beautiful piece. One line in particular really had me thinking. Carolyn was talking about the reality of being a separated parent and she said- ‘I am their mother […]
If you’ve made the decision to separate, the next question is often ‘where do I start?’ Where possible, I recommend keeping your lives ‘the same’ in the short term to give yourselves time to properly plan where you might both go next. It is often not necessary for your finances to immediately change a day […]
This week I have an admission to make. I have an addiction. Every Wednesday and Thursday evening for the past 10 or so weeks I have rushed home and taken up a seat to avidly watch 30 or so girls have their hearts unceremoniously broken on the national TV show, ‘The Bachelor’. And it turns out […]
As most of you know, I heavily advocate for families who are experiencing separation and divorce to do everything they can to stay away from the Family Court process. After 14 years working in the family law system, I have experienced firsthand the difficulties faced by families who find themselves before the Courts. The Court […]
Last week I was thrilled to be asked to be a regular monthly writer for the magazine ‘I AM WOMAN'(www.iamwomanmagazine.com.au) My first article was published last week and I thought I would share it with you- From a young age we learn to believe in love and all the beauty it can bring. As young […]
Divorce is said to be one of the most significant grief events many of us will ever suffer. Is it any wonder then, that during divorce, good people suddenly seem to be mad? As a Divorce Lawyer I have seen it all. People who in any other situation are entirely ‘normal’ all of a sudden […]
In writing my book this year I have had the privilege of interviewing families about their own experience of divorce and what is has meant for them. Earlier this year I spoke with Nicole of her experience of her parents’ divorce when she was a child. Nicole then sent me the comments below which I […]
After a week of fine tuning my book and finally pressing send on the email to my editor “Splitsville- How to separate, stay out of Court and stay friends”- is almost here so I decided I might share with you an extract- _____________________________________________________________________________ From Chapter 2 – WHERE DO I BEGIN? – THE BIG DECISION TO SEPARATE […]
This week I have been asked on a few occasions why I decided on “The Happy Family Lawyer”. It is a funny question as at the time I am not sure I was all that ‘Happy’ and I think I chose the word to remind myself every day of the importance of being just that- […]
What would you do with $100,000? Did you know that the financial outlay for your family to begin and finish a case before the Family Courts here in Australia, will be more than $100,000. This is almost a conservative estimate- I have no doubt that many families have spent many more thousands over the years […]
This week I had cause to remind myself just how grateful I am for the life I have been lucky enough to enjoy. The challenges that people face and overcome never cease to amaze me. After a long discussion this week I was reminded that you can find positives in even the most challenging of […]
Almost all of us have had our hearts broken at some stage in our lives. For me, it first happened when I was 16 years of age. I still remember those feelings so well- waking up each morning, those first few seconds when my world seemed okay, before that moment where everything seemed to stop. […]
Clarissa Rayward, The Happy Family Lawyer, is a Specialist Family Lawyer based in Brisbane, Australia. Clarissa is the Director of boutique Family Law Firm, Brisbane Family Law Centre (BFLC). Brisbane Family Law Centre is a multidisciplinary legal practice offering a holistic service to clients experiencing divorce and separation. An onsite team of specialist family lawyers are […]
‘Conscious Uncoupling’, a phrase that now seems so common and yet is so new to the dialogue of divorce thanks to Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin who announced their decision to “consciously uncouple” on the 25th March 2014. Since then I’ve read with interest the varied commentary on their decision and this supposedly new concept […]
Research continues to show that children who experience ongoing conflict between their parents after divorce are at significant risk of poorer adult outcomes in later life. These children have low self esteem, are withdrawn, cannot manage emotion, demonstrate their distress through poor behaviour and have difficulty maintaining friendships and relationships throughout life. We know that […]
Over the past two weeks I have found myself talking about yellow cars over and over. As a family lawyer I do not profess to be an expert in motor vehicles but I can assure you my “yellow car theory” seems to have a lot of application in the mine field that is post separation […]
It seems everywhere these days you are reading “the top ten tips” or “the seven simple ways” to achieve something- it is all the rage. When it comes to information about divorce I have recently read a lot of what not to do- lists of where people have gone wrong- so I thought I might […]
All is not fair in love and divorce. This morning while trying to drag myself from bed with my almost two year old jumping on my head I managed to hear a headline on TV- “A law firm with a difference- they only represent men. It is the only way that men can get a […]
When life gives you lemons make margaritas. The last few weeks I have been finishing off the manuscript for my book and in the process I have been seeking input from friends, clients and colleagues, who all have had some experience with divorce. It has been so interesting reading what everyone has to say. There […]
Amongst other things I am a Family Lawyer- a divorce lawyer who day in day out works with families to try and assist them through the legal issues that surround a marriage breakdown. Often this will involve advising on and negotiating the future living arrangements for young children- children that I will rarely meet and […]
